Instructions for a Godly Woman
These are the notes that I took down while listening to an audio sermon online. I thought I’d share them. If you’re interested in hearing the entire sermon, please click –> HERE <-- While I don’t agree totally with everything, I do think that it contains a lot of good information. I’ve placed my notes in blue, so you can see what I disagree with and why.
1. Defraud not your husband. Our bodies belong to our husband and our husband’s body belongs to us. Defraud means to keep back from someone something that is rightfully theirs. To withhold wrongly from another what is due him. You can’t keep what is not yours. This is a very important scripture. If you give your husband the “silent treatment” you are already defrauding your husband. You might not be saying no, but you are because you are not speaking to him. If you give in to him with your head, but not with your heart, you are defrauding him.
The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. ~ I Corinthians 7:4-5
2. A saved wife may save her husband. This is the one instance when the Word tells us that an unbeliever can be saved without the Word, by the example of their wife. In this instance, a woman’s behavior is as powerful as the Word of God. We must be very careful how we behave in front of our husbands.
And the woman which hath a husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. ~ I Corinthians 7:13-14
3. Headship Order. Jesus didn’t chafe that God was head over him, so we shouldn’t chafe over our headship. We can appeal to our head. Jesus obeyed until death. We want to fall into the headship order.
Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ. Now I praise you, brethren, that ye remember me in all things, and keep the ordinances, as I delivered them to you. But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God. ~ I Corinthians 11:1-3
4. We should cover our heads. (I believe that this is a personal choice between you and God, I don’t think that every woman is called to wear the headcovering. I choose to wear one because I feel convicted to wear one as a reminder of my place in the headship order and to be submissive to my husband and the Lord. ~ Susan) It’s a shame not to cover you head. This is a lost teaching. It’s a constant reminder of the headship order. The churches that drop the covering drop the headship order. The majority of modern churches do not teach the headship order. Wearing the cover helps you to be humble, meek, quiet and gentle. It reminds us that we represent Jesus Christ and helps us act accordingly. The way we dress affects the way that we act.
Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoreth his head, But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoreth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven. For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered. For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man. For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels. Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord. For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God. Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered? Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him? But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering. But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God. ~ I Corinthians 11:4-16
5. Likewise with long hair. (I don’t believe that all women MUST have long hair. But I do believe that the Lord wants women to be easily distinguished from men. I choose to have long hair as a conviction from the Lord. I do believe that this is another one of those instances where the decision lies between the individual person and the Lord. ~ Susan) God wanted women to have long hair. We often complain about having long hair, because it takes so much work to take care of, we consider it a burden. Do not say that something that God has given you as a glory is a burden.
Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoreth his head, But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoreth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven. For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered. For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man. For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels. Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord. For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God. Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered? Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him? But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering. But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God. ~ I Corinthians 11:4-16
6. Wives should be submissive to their husbands as they would to the Lord. Christ is the head of the church; our husband’s are the head of our homes. Being submissive is a relief and a freedom
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. ~ Ephesians 5:22
7. We should be submissive in everything. Women who are upright have a protection (through Christ). There is a church body that is there to help.
For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. ~ Ephesians 5:23-24
8. As it is fit to the Lord. Submit yourselves unto your own husbands. Don’t compare what other husbands want. Examine your heart and make sure your husband knows you want to please God. You must not manipulate him.
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. ~ Colossians 3:18
9. Holy dress. (For me this means that I feel called to wear dresses and/or skirts only. Other women may interpret this in a different way. Again, I don’t think that all women should wear the same style dress, but all should dress in a modest manner. ~ Susan) Modesty means not revealing your body and you should not dress to entice men or cause our brothers to sin. Not make yourself the center of attention. You don’t want to look sharp or better than others. What you wear reflects a lot about you. The way you dress reflect the way you feel. Do you want to reflect that your a Godly woman or as a worldly woman? We ought to look different than those who serve the world.
I will therefore that men pray every where, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting. In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array. But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works. ~ I Timothy 2:8-10
10. Not with gold, not with pearls. (To me, I interpret this to mean that we should not dress in a flashy way that draws attention to you. I don’t think we should disallow any particular colors or anything like that, but that we should not dress in such a way to draw too much attention to ourselves. ~ Susan) It’s flashy and draws attention to you. They upgrade the outfit and make you look classy. It makes us looks prosperous, which draws people away from God and more to the world. We should draw people to Jesus.
In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array. ~I Timothy 2:9
11. Learning in silence. Do not argue your viewpoint with men and indirectly teach men. Women should not be pastors that teach men.
Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. ~ I Timothy 2:11-12
12. If you stay in your place you will do fine if you continue in faith, charity, holiness and sobriety. Look to older women to teach your sobriety. Don’t have authority over men. Try living in faith, charity, holiness and sobriety for 1 year. Having faith will keep us from fearing the future. Charity is love in action and giving to those who need. Sobriety is cool reason. Sober is not given to heated passion; it’s calm and moderate.
And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety. ~ I Timothy 2:14-15
13. Older women teach the younger women. All older women to live in Christ should teach younger women. As your husband most things, ask older women these things. Are you asking the women the correct questions? Discuss these things with women, not questions about doctrine or church business, those questions should be asked of your husband. We should be prayerful when we discuss these things with our husbands.
The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. ~ Titus 2:3-5
14. Disobeying our husbands blasphemies the word of God. These teaching give us clear directions.
To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. ~ Titus 2:5
15. Love our husbands and our children. Do others see that we love our husband? Pray that the Lord helps us to love our husbands at all times and gives us a deeper love for him. Ask God to make you love your husband. Pray that you love your husband more today than yesterday.
That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, ~ Titus 2:4
16. Our husbands can be won by our behavior if we are a chaste woman. We are to be chaste. Don’t expect to win your husband toward Christ if you dress and act in a worldly manner (carnal). Another definition of chaste is separate and pure and free from obscenity. You will notice, as you become more chaste, even very vulgar men will be less vulgar around you. Being a chaste woman is a protection for us.
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. ~ I Peter 3:1-4
17. Develop a meek and quiet spirit that trusts in God. What they mean by quiet is the opposite of restless. Your spirit is at rest and you are not concerned about what tomorrow will bring; you are not fearful of the future.
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. ~ I Peter 3:1-4
18. We are to act like the holy women of old times. Many people have no other Godly women in their lives. We are to be in subjection to our own husbands. God tells us to act like Sarah. You must know your enemy to fight your enemy. Our enemy is fear and amazement. Fear causes you to question your husband’s decisions and the future. Recognize your fear and conquer it. Amazement makes you ask “what is he doing??” “I don’t believe it!”. We should obey our husbands without any fear or amazement, it’s hard, but it is possible. That’s how God wants us to do it.
For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. ~ I Peter 3:5-6
